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    All choked up Hi, my name is and Ive been thinking of trying an as yet untested, but promising tactic for meeting new women. I recently learned the Heimlich Maneuver and Im thinking that I will start spending time in some steakhouses and hot dog joints, (cause thats where most people choke) in hopes of meeting my dream girl when she suddenly realizes she cant breathe because her esophagus has plugged up. My dream meeting goes something like this.
    I spot you across the crowded room. You are alone, and your demeanor suggests you are available, but doesnt quite get to the point of screaming "Im desperate!" As I watch you chew your food and admire the way your teeth seem to mesh together just perfectly, it happens. And I was just thinking to myself, "Oh no, shes chewing too fast!" Suddenly a look of horror appears on your face as you realize you cannot take a breath, speak, or swallow, because you did not properly complete the mastication process. It all seems to be happening in slow motion, your body convulsing (strangely enough, in time to the music in my head, which is the song, "Weve Only Just Begun", by the Carpenters), and I realize that this may be IT, this may be the MOMENT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR, this may be HER. So I head your way, and by the time I reach you , your face is beginning to turn an attractive shade of purple, contrasting in a nice way with the blue tint that is starting to appear in your lips, which, oddly enough, is very alluring. And just as the music in my mind reaches an arousing crescendo, I step in behind you, hold you in just the right way, (kind of like I was showing you the proper way to do a combo shot in 8-ball) give a quick squeeze, and presto! Theres your weinie on the floor! (Thats something I hope no one ever says to me, by the way.)
    And then, like always happens in first meetings, there is that awkward moment, that uncomfortable pause where neither of us knows quite what to say. As we fidget momentarily, I (not knowing quite what the etiquette is in this situation) bend and pick up your recently expelled weinie and hand it to you. You glance at it and pop it into your mouth. And this time, Im proud to notice, you take your time chewing. So far no words have passed between us, and it has become one of those magic moments that do not happen often, and should not be passed up. So I slowly and tenderly reach in for that first gentle kiss .but then am forced to quickly recoil, because, after all, your mouth smells like vomit. (Which is NOT a deal killer, if it doesnt happen with any kind of regularity.) We exchange numbers and decide to meet for, oh, say yogurt! So if, after reading my profile, you think you might be interested, and are willing to take a chance on choking to death for true love, me for a schedule of where Ill be and when. Youll know its me when you see the guy at the corner table nonchalantly and unpretentiously practicing what I the "Heimlich Flex" as a warm up. Hope to see you soon!

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    Professional WM looking for mutually beneficial m4w NRV professional in search of a fun, no-drama relationship I have an excellent budget for fun and entertainment, so lets see if we are meant to enjoy time together!
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  • Lonely senior ready horny fucking East Dunbartonshire Binatural's thread below got me to thinking about what the best way would be for some guys to tell their wives or girlfriends they're sexually interested in men. This would be especially relevant for guys who have been married for ten or twenty years and have wives who have no clue about their husband's interest in other men. I know I luckily outed myself gradually to my wife. First, it was just occasional comments made while having sex and being a bit drunk. I'd suggest a threesome with another guy and maybe sucking his. I think the wife just tossed those aside as drunken ramblings at first, but after a while I think she knew. I made more and more comments regarding sex with men over the years, eventually referring to myself as a queer or homo to her. I don't know that I ever said "-, I think you should know I'm homosexual". Anyway, that's what worked for me. Wasn't really perfect as I don't think she knows just how much I'm interested in other guys, but I can cross dress and play with dongs and don't have to hide it. I'm wondering, though, how someone who has been married and closeted for 20 years might be able to bring up the subject in a way that doesn't scare or shock the wife too much. Any ideas? I was thinking it would be best to set up a situation that would allow you to bring up the issue naturally. About the only thing I could think of is watching porn together but, if you don't normally watch porn, that might be too much of a shock in itself. I realize some guys just can't tell their wives. I've chatted with a number of guys who where emphatic that their wives would divorce them if they told them they were interested in men. But what about the others?
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