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1. Hiding is very UNattractive, so you severely limit your options as as you remain. And, it makes you vulnerable to scams and lies. Get over your fear and live your life before ts too late. 2. Get off the internet. >90% of the ads are false in one way or another. Of the <10% truthful ones, half of them are like you and never show up in person. You need to go someplace where you MEET other guys. 3. Bars and clubs are obvious hook up places, but if you want something LOTS better, find some organizations or *activity* groups to join. What interests you? gardening?? volleyball? politics? Look around and what groups you might join where the principle activity is not drinking or fucking. Find ONE, and it lead you to others the guys who like to do things usually do LOTS of things. 4. Lancaster is a bit far from here (~Rockville, MD), but not so far that you couldn't show up at some of the more substantial activities. Fact is, there are more groups around here than I can possibly keep up with. I run an "extreme croquet" group that's been featured in the City Paper. With coming, there be lots of all-day picnics, pool parties, and other events organized by various groups. If you cant find anything closer, you might make a drive to the DC area.

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shit. EVERYONE feels like shit when they get dumped and just about everyone I know who's been through divorce had no idea it would be so hard and that includes me. Fuck food tastes like cardboard, sleep well that's a thing of the past for a bit and the fucking obsessing just about kill you. It's depressing as hell and your mind is a prison that replays all the fucked up shit and for some stupid reason it won't shut off. You hate yourself for doing it but every time you talk to a friend all you do is yap about how shitty it all feels, how this punishment doesn't seem to fit the and somehow you're supposed to go on. Yeah, divorce sucks, sucks bad and like a kidney stone you don't know what it feels like unless you've done it. OK so you're not alone in feeling the way you do, quit ing yourself a fucking pussy and ranting about yourself and if you are that serious, CALL THE NUMBER. Also lose this stupid chip on your shoulder about 'no way I'm taking pills for this', leave no options off the table. There's nothing shameful about needing medication if it helps you get through this, it's shameful NOT to if it's needed. It means you won't do what you need to do, it means you're chosing part of this punishment for some fucked up reason. PD said, and rightfully so .YOU are responsible for your condition. We all are. Does that mean tomorrow if you decide to start getting better it all just happen fuck no but you have to START and then you've got to keep it up. You're going to have to yourself through. Sooner or later you are going to have to decide to no longer be so pathetic, you'll have to do what everyone has had to do and decide that you're going to live and do the best you can. If talking to the therapist helped some, then do more of it. Hopefully the person give you some things to work on, get some books too if you're having this much trouble. Do something good for yourself EVERY DAY eat right, even when you don't feel like it. Go for a walk daily, or the gym, or a swim but get the fuck out of the house go ahead and burden those friends a bit. Post here whatever it fucking takes. There be more bad days but life does get better IF you work at it.

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Stop helping her, cut all ties-even if she's in a car accident-she needs to find someone to depend on. Maybe he enjoys her neediness. Could you try and rely on him a bit more and make him feel important and like a hero? Do you go on fishing trips with him too? He's inviting his mistress out with friends and co-workers instead of you. Confiding in her about private things in your life. While at one point you said he could have a girlfriend, you are no longer ok with it. So now it's up to him if he wants to work it out with you or not-regardless if you at one time said it was ok or not-it no longer is.

I think to say that I should know everything she does everyday would be known as controlling. She doesn't need to tell me her every move. She told me a bit ago that she got the tattoo to feel more sexy. She also said that she planned to get only one but now has "another in mind" but is still thinking about it. I need to be honest and say that this has been a hard week. A pack of cigarettes fell out of her purse earlier in the week when she was reaching for her wallet. I had no idea that she smoked. She assured me it's "no big deal, don't worry about it. I don't smoke often." And now this .

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