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Daniel
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Hey. im 20. very attractive and if i were to compare myself to any celeb i would most likely be the black version of Angelina Jolie. Sexy but tough. Yes i have a boyfriend but sometimes i want a female around...No not off some crazy freaky porno type stuff. But just someone to flirt with. My fantasy is to really put on a strap and fuck a female. i have never but would love to. I was hoping we could also be friends, do things like shopping,manis/pedis, talk,text.
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of over-analyzing things. Why not just date men you feel good around and where it goes? Not everything has to be about a timeline/having -/meeting "the one" It sounds a bit like you're still avoiding intimacy by finding excuses not to continue dating men. How did they survive without or marriage? What the heck? You did so why are you judging THEM because of it? They seem like your best match, if anything. In the same way, a single dad might look at you as a risk for being too reserved, or not wanting to truly open yourself to. And if they do, from what you wrote that sounds spot on. Have you seen a therapist about why you avoid intimacy? You admit to self reflection and realizing where it comes from, so why don't you make the mental challenge of overcoming that fear take a plunge and give closeness a shot. As someone who was married for 15 years and thought my ex was everything, only to lose that and realize my whole relationship was a sham, I wouldn't trade it for anything! I loved with all my heart, learned from my mistakes and have so much (because of it) for my future. Do you think I'm to open up after my betrayal? Heck no! I've tasted the delicious flavor of giving my all to the one I loved it felt great. I want that again. But this time I'll be more selective of who gets that kind of deep.
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I am not sure what you are looking for in an answer and I don't know if there really is an answer to this situation. It sounds like you and your spouse are, you met, you married and you went away. If that is the case then you didn't really get a to form a relationship first and become friends before you married. If your wife was truly in with you, the obvious would happen. 1. she would sleep with you every she had (especially knowing that you are leaving again) 2. She would take the time to be home with you and talk with you about whatever. It just doesn't seem to feel that this relationship has much glue to it. You know what I mean? I would never tell anyone to divorce that is not my place to say that. I am a bit older, yes but I believe in life and and I believe that when we make that commitment to that that commitment comes first! If she loved you like a wife should a husband, yes even in the 20th century; she would be home not out with friends and she would not have to be asked to make to her husband she would already be there. Maybe she is too to be married with that commitment and have you gone all the time. Sounds like she is treating this marriage with not alot of her energy in it. She is having fun with friends and doing as she likes and then you come home to your wife and she has to go out and find her I wish you much safety in your travels and Thank You Sir for doing your duty for us here at home. I wish you much luck in finding that true that you seem to be looking for. Good luck! porgesgirl
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You are trying to figure out life at 19? I remember those days. So cocksure that life was a simple equation and I'd make it my bitch. I filled my head with that delusion for the better part of a decade and woke up to a shitty life and a sore asshole! You are going to hear a lot of this and hate it equally every time so I'd get used to it now: YOU ARE 19 YEARS OLD! LIFE IS CONFUSING, A MILLION SHADES OF GREY, AND MESSY AS HELL! REAL ANSWERS TAKE TIME AND OFTEN INVOLVE A GREAT DEAL OF TRIAL AND ERROR! Mess around for a bit! Keep your cock covered and nail anything/one with a pulse. Be 19! If'n you are a hot 19 year old the world is your oyster. Go out there and the people jump when you flirt. Play the Dicksom card and get yourself a sugar daddy or mama or both. Roll around in your daddy's caddy. Get an edjumacation while you are at it. Over the next decade or so you figure it out. In the interim, don't worry about it! Believe me; as your perception grows to encompass more of the world you be much happier as you learn to ignore the endless misery and suffering this world has to offer!
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