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  • Im married to my roomate. Normal to go outside of your marriage looking for companionship? Really? Do you really need us to backcheck you on this one? Please don't play the stupid card. Here's the deal: You need to be using the energy you are putting into this new relationship into your marriage. You can't be on-line meeting people, chatting people up, meeting them for coffee and thinking about them it's taking away from the work you need to be doing at home. If you and your wife need a little marriage counseling in order to learn how to argue, or maybe some parenting classes to learn how to deal with the 17 year old, then THAT'S where your energy should be going. Just because it have been easy up to this point doesn't mean that you get to start wandering around when the going gets just a bit rough. Just curious what is it about your 17 year old that you and your wife disagree on?
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  • Seeking pnp friend now till post closes. And they are getting a bit jumbled together. The first is alcohol use/-. I'm not clear from this if he is indeed an alcoholic, though certain things you say seem to point to that. Namely, alcohol negatively impacting his day to day life, and not having control over it's use. This requires treatment. You can't move forward and build an equitable life with someone living in addiction. However, it's very common to have addiction be the scapegoat of all problems in the relationship, and it usually isn't. For both the addict and the family, there is a sense that 'if he quits everything be fine'. It never is. I think even if he never takes another sip of alcohol, you very well continue feeling like your relationship is out of balance. He'll be working on his sobriety, while you'll still be working on everything. These two issues are related, of course, but I don't think it's a 'fix one, fix the other' kind of situation.
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